by Tracee Sioux
When considering things that go into raising a confident, strong daughter having the benefit of a great dad ranks right up there.
As I watched my husband twirl Ainsley around a dance floor Friday night - and even flip her around just like her Dancing With the Stars fantasy - I thought, She's so lucky to have an exceptionally good dad.
Ainsley was an only child for 4 years and he never shied away from the traditionally "boy things" with her. Now that she has a brother, he does these things with both of them.
He wrestles with her nearly every day. He took her to Yankees and Mets games when we lived in NYC. He watched sports with her on TV. He takes her golfing with him. He supports her participation in athletics like soccer, t-ball and karate.
At the same time he always responds positively when she fishes for compliments about her beauty and fashion sense.
He will expect her to go to college and he will expect her to get good grades. He will expect her to expand her intellect over her appearance.
He never tells her she can't accomplish anything because she is a girl.
He does dishes and helps cleans up around the house. He's such a good example for what she can and should expect from a husband in her future.
He is gentle and loving with our son as well. Secure enough in his own masculinity to allow Zack to wear Mommy's red pumps, carry his money around in his sister's purse, or cuddle with a baby doll, without hysteria about turning him gay.
He prays with both kids most nights, teaching them how to access God and gives them a spiritual foundation.
He's home with us most nights and weekends, so regularly that Ainsley almost experiences his occasional working late as a rejection or trauma. I miss Daddy, she'll cry if he has to work late several days in a row. Often he'll come home for the evening and return to work once they've gone to bed.
He is patient and firm, in a way I can't seem to manage. They never question his authority, which makes me jealous and a little mad because it seems her hobby is to question mine.
I have very rarely seen him lose his cool, while I lose mine semi-regularly (see above paragraph for a simple explanation).
He grounds us.
I have never once seen him raise his hand to her or speak an insulting or belittling word to her.
Happy Father's Day, Honey. The kids and I nominate you Father of the Year.
1 comment:
Tracee,
That was a beautiful article! You are so absolutely correct about the impact a great father can have on any child... boy or girl.
It's great that he does supposed "boy" things with her. My husband does the same thing with our daughter.
She helps him fix the lawn tractor (and so many other things)! She changes the batteries in her toys without needing help from us. (My parents would never have let me do this at age 7 but Katie's been changing batteries in her electronic toys for some time now.
She is his helper when it's time to fix things around the house.
It's good for both of them. He gets the pleasure of her company, gets to bond with her, gets to share his knowledge with her, and gets the satisfaction of knowing she won't grow up "helpless" on "male tasks".
She gets the pleasure of his company, the bonding time, to learn SO many things from him, and the self-confidence and healthy pride that go with her knowing she CAN do/understand these certain things he has taught her/shared with her.
It makes them both feel great!
I loved your article. With me having numerous chronic illnesses and having many limitations on what I can do, my husband does all sorts of things around the house.
He is "The Chef" of the house. I try hard to stay on top of laundry but if I'm having a rough patch with my fibromyalgia or some other illness where carrying loads of laundry up and down the stairs becomes nearly impossible, he'll just pitch in when he sees a backlog forming.
So Katie and I nominate my hubby to be tied for 1st place for Father of the Year. :)
Jeanne
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